10,000 Bc

[jdhdiggs]

This movie may be the worst steaming pile of turd over put to celluloid. At least most other "bad" movies have the decency to know that they suck and embrace it in a way that's somewhat entertaining.

This giant suck fest couldn't even be consistant- It kept trying to be "serious" all the while I kept expecting a marine in a humvee to pull up and start shooting everyone until a T-rex eats his ass while farting penguins all over the place. You think that sounds far fetched? Watch the movie, dumber crap happens.

The ONLY way I can see anyone enjoying this movie is to be drunk, high, or be receiving oral sex during the viewing. Perhaps it might take all three to make it time well spent. Who knows, I'm going to go drink the memory of this, this, whatever the hell that was out of my head.

Goodnight... I think I'll go cheesegrate my ass as punishment for thinking this might have been an entertaining bad movie...

[trubluluc]

I could have told you that just from watching the trailers.
Looks like it was made in a trailer park.

"We don't get fooled again! No No"

-Luc

[jdhdiggs]

That's the thing, I was EXPECTING a bad movie, this was worse: It was a bad movie that conviced itself that it was a good, deep thought proviking prophecy/love story.

[mark090852]

This movie may be the worst steaming pile of turd over put to celluloid. At least most other "bad" movies have the decency to know that they suck and embrace it in a way that's somewhat entertaining.

This giant suck fest couldn't even be consistant- It kept trying to be "serious" all the while I kept expecting a marine in a humvee to pull up and start shooting everyone until a T-rex eats his ass while farting penguins all over the place. You think that sounds far fetched? Watch the movie, dumber crap happens.

The ONLY way I can see anyone enjoying this movie is to be drunk, high, or be receiving oral sex during the viewing. Perhaps it might take all three to make it time well spent. Who knows, I'm going to go drink the memory of this, this, whatever the hell that was out of my head.

Goodnight... I think I'll go cheesegrate my ass as punishment for thinking this might have been an entertaining bad movie...

Don't hold back, tell us what you really think of it! :)

[Finiti]

Damn, was planning on seeing this tomorrow. Probably go see something else now, thanks for the review.

[Lasareath]

Isn't this movie one step above the history channel documentary?

[hockeyboy]

I haven't heard one person say anything good about it. My friends saw it tonight, and all came back with "Worst Movie Ever" reviews.

[shadowofnight]

That sucks...guess I'll wait for the quick transfer to dvd/blu-ray.......

[danger boy]

from the trailers... i could tell is was a suck-o movie. i won't be seeing this one ever.

[jdhdiggs]

You know its bad when the 6 year old behind us starts complaining: "Mom, whoooly mammoths can survive in the desert, it's too hot. What do they eat?"

Or when the "Prophecy is revealed" scene and half the theater bursts into laughter so bad you can no longer hear the dialogue.

Want to know what the movie is? SPOILERS (Kind of):


SPOILERS!!! ( Not that one could spoil this movie any worse than what it does to itself)







Take the story of Moses (Lost with his people in the desert, let my people go), Jesus (The prophesized one killed and returned to life so his/her people can live), Stargate, and the 12th warrior and put the whole stinkpile on a back drop of the "lost world", "King Kong" and "Clan of the Cave Bear". Let's not forget the climax seen stolen DIRECTLY from 300.

Now that you are thouroughly confused, you have the movie correctly in your head, now I expect you to send me money for having save you from this travesty.

[avelanchefan]

I'll paypal it to you buddy. I guess this will be at the bottom of my torrent que list.

[obieone]

IF it's any consolation, your review has had me laughing for the past 10 minutes!!!
The commercials look confusing, just like that movie 'Babel'!
If I can't get a clue from the commercials, they don't get a 2nd glance!
Sorry for your loss, and thanks for the heads up.

It's official- Hollywood is CLUELESS!!! I hope those writers STARVE to death!

[jakelm]

You didnt like the big cat? MEOW!!!

[life777]

I really want to watch this movie...

[Danny Tse]

I kept expecting a marine in a humvee to pull up and start shooting everyone until a T-rex eats his ass while farting penguins all over the place.

That's quite a mental image I am getting :D

Seriously, if there're no cavegirls catfighting, I'm not going. I really think any movie with "BC" in its title has to have such a action sequence.

[obieone]

I just saw the review of this movie on Reelz ch.'s 'Movie Mob' LMFAO!
Just as y'all described it. They TRASHED this flick, BIG time!!!
I'm still laughing!

At least with "1,000,000 B.C.", you had Racquel Welch to make it worth the price of admission!