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  1. #1

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    Default Bad joke..sorry it's hump day and I'm bored

    On a golf tour in Ireland, Tiger Woods drives his BMW into a petrol station in a remote part of the Irish countryside.

    The pump attendant, who obviously knows nothing about golf and completely unaware of Tiger's identity,
    greets him in a typical Irish manner.

    "Top of the mornin' to ya, sir," says the attendant.

    Tiger, who is familiar with Irish custom, responds with,

    "And the rest of the day to you, sir!"

    Tiger gives a quick nod and bends forward to pick up the nozzle of the gasoline hose.

    As he does so, two golf tees fall out of his
    shirt pocket onto the ground.

    "What are those?" asks the attendant.

    "They're called tees," replies Tiger.

    "And what on the good earth are they fer?"
    inquires the Irishman.

    "They're for resting my balls on when I'm driving," says Tiger.

    "Feckin Jaysus," says the Irishman, "BMW tinks of everything!"
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  2. #2

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    Default

    :D
    'Political Correctness'.........defined

    "A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end."

  3. #3

    Member Sales Rating: (8)

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    Default

    Tiger Woods went to play at a private course in Alabama. He went into the pro shop and asked the starter if he could play as a guest. "Sorry" said the starter, "but this club is for white boys only, but there is another club you can play at down the road. It's only a Driver and a 3-Wood away". "Hang on a minute" said Woods "don't you know who I am?" "Nope who are you?" said the starter "I am Tiger Woods" "Well in that case" said the starter, "It's only Driver and an 8-Iron.
    "Just because you’re offended doesn’t mean you’re right." - Ricky Gervais

    "For those who believe, no proof is necessary. For those who don't believe, no proof is possible." - Stuart Chase

    "Consistency requires you to be as ignorant today as you were a year ago." - Bernard Berenson

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