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  1. #1

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    Default Frustrated Braves Fan

    Yeah, I figure I might as well vent somewhere.
    The rotation is pissing me off.
    I hope the Mets' private plane blows up, falling down onto PNC park taking out the Phillies infielders.
    Carlyle needs a good game to solidify his spot in the organization.
    Renteria needs an old-school booster shot (the one Mickey used to get).
    Why does the strikezone always seem to expand everytime a Braves batter is up to the plate?
    Teixeira needs to pass-up free-agency and stay with the Braves for an extra year.
    Smoltz is going to outlast the nuclear holocaust and Keith Richards.
    Hudson IS going to get the Cy Young.
    Chucky will come off the DL with a third pitch and throw a no-hitter or I'll kill a bunny.

    None of this is up for debate, the statements come straight from the highest source in the universe, Ribbono Shel Olom.

  2. #2

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    Have you already captured the bunny? Or do you need me to bring one from the Bluegrass state?

    As for Renters, I think him and Hampton should man-up and play in full-body casts. Repeat after me: The DL is not your friend.

    Teixeira will pass up free agency, because he is having too much fun being a Bravo. 29 RBI's in 18 games?!? Plus 8 or 9 dingers? That's sick. And he never smiled that much in Texas... though Salty was grinning like ear to ear after his two jacks in that 30-3 nuclear holocaust in Maryland.

    Huddy will win the Cy Young because the universe will implode if Brandon Webb wins it twice in a row. It's written in ancient Sumerian text.

    Chucky just needs to learn a spitter. A well-concealed one. I'll take that as his third pitch.

    Smoltzy sold his soul to the devil (aka Glavine) for his productive longevity. One day Tommyboy gonna come knockin' and we're going to have to be there to bail him out.

    Cormier needs run support. Oh wait, if we gave him that he would just give up more. He thinks it War. My King beats your Jack.
    I never had it like this where I grew up. But I send my kids here because the fact is you go to one of the best schools in the country: Rushmore. Now, for some of you it doesn't matter. You were born rich and you're going to stay rich. But here's my advice to the rest of you: Take dead aim on the rich boys. Get them in the crosshairs and take them down. Just remember, they can buy anything but they can't buy backbone. Don't let them forget it. Thank you.Herman Blume - Rushmore

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by zombie boy 2000 View Post
    Have you already captured the bunny? Or do you need me to bring one from the Bluegrass state?

    As for Renters, I think him and Hampton should man-up and play in full-body casts. Repeat after me: The DL is not your friend.

    Teixeira will pass up free agency, because he is having too much fun being a Bravo. 29 RBI's in 18 games?!? Plus 8 or 9 dingers? That's sick. And he never smiled that much in Texas... though Salty was grinning like ear to ear after his two jacks in that 30-3 nuclear holocaust in Maryland.

    Huddy will win the Cy Young because the universe will implode if Brandon Webb wins it twice in a row. It's written in ancient Sumerian text.

    Chucky just needs to learn a spitter. A well-concealed one. I'll take that as his third pitch.

    Smoltzy sold his soul to the devil (aka Glavine) for his productive longevity. One day Tommyboy gonna come knockin' and we're going to have to be there to bail him out.

    Cormier needs run support. Oh wait, if we gave him that he would just give up more. He thinks it War. My King beats your Jack.


    You can bring the bunny if you feel like it, I think I can catch one around here if I find one between Halo matches.

    Mike Hampton is still alive?????

    Chucky doesn't have any body torque or enough arm angle to get an effective splitter, a slurve might be nice though. Maybe a Papelbon "slutter", nah he would just leave it over the plate.

    I'll take all three of 'em back, and even throw in David Wells. If we are going to lose. At least I know they won't be crying in the dugout about a bad call, they will be serving a suspension for arguing with the moron calling the zone.

    Run support may be negligible for him, but consistency on that beautiful cut fastball he can throw is lacking. We need to just start giving him a handicap every game, I think there is a rule for that somewhere in baseball.....

  4. #4

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    Go back and read my Chucky James post...
    spitter amigo
    SPITTER.
    You think that mouth-breather could actually learn to throw something like a "splitter"?

    Eff David Wells... I'd take Bob Ojeda coming out of retirement and a sixer of Milwaukee's Best for our bottom three. I'll even allow Bobby a chance to shear off another finger before entering the rotation.

    Handicap? Yeah, it exists. It's called the Yankee payroll.

  5. #5

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    Default Mouth breather

    That is classic, where did you come up with that one? And what happened to the Chucky James bandwagon, did you fall off or did it implode into a blackhole and suck your deep emotions for him, along with yourself, into it.

    In all honestly, on the question of a third pitch, a slurve would be beautiful for him. I know you aren't that knowledgeable about baseball :p but if you look it up you'd understand, though it might take you a little bit longer than most. He would just basically need to cross his "show-em" curve and that changeup together.

  6. #6

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    Chucky-poo has broken many, many hearts and mine is just one of 'em. How the hell are you gonna bookend a 1.09 ERA over 4 starts with utter crapola. Yeah, I'm marching right on down the Trail of Tears because that toilet plunger made me eat crow? I'd rather eat crow and have a solid 3-man than keep watching this sideshow.

    A slurve? If you think that's the remedy, then put it on a postcard and mail it to Jack McDowell. It's not an easy pitch to learn. If he only has two in arsenal, I'd think he be better off trying something else.

    Seriously... I really think Chuck has great stuff. And has the potential to be a great starter. But you've been right all along. Two pitches will get through the line-up once on a good night. Unless you're Randy Johnson in his prime. Then you can just play chin music all night long and watch 'em crap their pants.

    I gotta go Germ. Go dive headfirst into the above ground pool. Make sure you do ten shots of vodka before attempting such an AMAZING feat. (emoticon)

    ps You do realize Carlyle (re: not Smoltzy) is pitching tonight? I guess ol' Bobby thought we would just march our way into Cincy and sweep the series. Now we're looking to salvage a split against the WORST team in baseball. And trust me... living in the Ohio Valley, they are the WORST team in baseball. Sorry Kansas City, Tampa Bay, Pittsburgh, Toledo Mud Hens... I call it as I see it.

  7. #7

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    I have to disagree to the difficulty of the pitch for someone like Chucky, if he extends his arm out a bit more and turns his wrist over, I think it would shoot out more like a slurve anyway.

    Was ten your count, I thought it was a bit more when you belly-head-balls into the pool.

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    It could be worse, you could be an orioles fan and getting over a 30-3 loss...
    -Cody
    Music is like candy, you have to get rid of the rappers to enjoy it

  9. #9

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    At the rate they are going, the Brewers will be lucky to finish five games ahead of the Pirates.
    Carl

  10. #10
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    I was going to read the whole thread but I didn't and I gotta tell you I feel no sorrow for you or your Braves. 15 years of being in first place does not earn you guys the right to complain about anything. . . except maybe only winning one world series IIRC>>>>>> :D :p

    Rant completed by a very frustrated Phillies fan!!!

    BTW crakin corn an I don't care. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA you lunatic!

  11. #11

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    15 years of winning can never cleanse the Braves of the Hubbard, Virgil, and Joe Boever "the Saver" years...

    Chief Knock-a-homer, anyone? Give me 30 straight World Series wins and a lifetime supply of Ajax, and maybe I'll consider settling for 15 straight division titles.

    And so much for that split against Cincy.

  12. #12

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    On the issue of Texas upsetting the O's, more power Salty. I'm more than happy to see his name attached to record, but I woe for all of those trips Mazzoni had to of made to the mound.

    I hope the Pirates pull of the miracle run, on the back of LaRoche, and win it all..... (Kee hee hee (girl scout laugh))

    Oh, let's not forget to address the frustrated Phillies fan. Let's make a pact to wish for the Mets to drop 2 out of 3 for the rest of the go and make it a two team race. I promise to wish good thoughts on your guys if you'd do it for us.
    On a side note, please take it a little easier on your guys. You people maybe frustrated but you guys turn into fans of equivalency to the lunatics in New York when the slightest bump in the road happens. A cold shoulder works just as well, sometimes, as a loud sneer.

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