Fun quotes from "For Sale" adds

[Ricardo]

I thought this would be a fun subject; have seen many "quotable" adds..

I'll get started with this one:

"This record is used, but in excellent condition. It has scuffs but they are from careful use."

[carpenter]

from a suzuki bike ad:

"I'm selling because it was purchased without the proper consent of a loving wife, Apparently "do whatever the **** you want" doesn't mean what I thought"

[Fireman32]

from a suzuki bike ad:

"I'm selling because it was purchased without the proper consent of a loving wife, Apparently "do whatever the **** you want" doesn't mean what I thought"

That quote is priceless!!!!

[Keiko]

From a local pennysaver newspaper.

"Well endowed male with herpes seeks female with same for intimacy and friendship."

A well endowed female w/herpes?

[dragon1952]

Must be looking for a Herme :D

[hoosier21]

Sunfire preamp ad on Ebay

"Next best thing is to use Sunfire's Precision Inverse RIAA network to listen to CDs through its classic vacuum tube phone stage. Digital recording will sound like analog LP."

[Ricardo]

The Audio Research Reference 600 monoblocks are a fling, a one-night stand or a filthily expensive, unforgettable dirty weekend. These babies don't want anything to do with, or even any trace of, a long-term relationship. They could tear your heart apart and leave you broke in the blink of an eye and you would just have to pick yourself up again get on with your life.

If you are still lucky enough to be single and insist on having THE biggest pair of stainless steel testicles in Australia then these mammoth monsters have your name on the shipping label. Providing of course you can pay for them but at less than half the cost of their original new price are you going to complain? Well some of you will I am sure but you know what you can do about that...

Let nobody doubt your manhood ever again with these World Heavy Weight Champions featured prominently in your Hi-Fi room on centre stage.

Much to my disappointment, never have I sold any Reference 600's to a customer that has had a gal to answer to. Too spineless and pussy whipped I'm afraid is all too often the case. But there are a few Hardcore Tubeheadz out there that will let no man, woman or child stand in the way of their ultimate listening pleasure. To them; I salute you! We should all have the good manners to stand back and admire their pure and uncompromising dedication to an utterly extravagant and overwhelmingly hardcore indulgence in a world that is growing more mundane and impersonal each and every spirit sapping day. Come home to these perfect REF600 Mk.III monoblocks every night and you will be lifted to another dimension of reality that so few will ever experience in their lifetime it almost makes you feel an ounce of pity for their sad and sorry souls. But nay, I did said; almost.

[beardog03]

that bike ad made me laugh so loud that my wife came into my office to see what was up...

I told her,"sounds like the boat !"





I still think it`s funny....!

[janmike]

Here is a typical ebay ad.

Inside the ad it states:

"We highly recommend our buyers to purchase insurance for your items, we will be not responsible for any lost or damaged items."

At the bottom of the ad it states:

"Shipping insurance
Not offered"

Go figure.

[audiobliss]

The Audio Research Reference 600 monoblocks are a fling, a one-night stand or a filthily expensive, unforgettable dirty weekend. These babies don't want anything to do with, or even any trace of, a long-term relationship. They could tear your heart apart and leave you broke in the blink of an eye and you would just have to pick yourself up again get on with your life.

If you are still lucky enough to be single and insist on having THE biggest pair of stainless steel testicles in Australia then these mammoth monsters have your name on the shipping label. Providing of course you can pay for them but at less than half the cost of their original new price are you going to complain? Well some of you will I am sure but you know what you can do about that...

Let nobody doubt your manhood ever again with these World Heavy Weight Champions featured prominently in your Hi-Fi room on centre stage.

Much to my disappointment, never have I sold any Reference 600's to a customer that has had a gal to answer to. Too spineless and pussy whipped I'm afraid is all too often the case. But there are a few Hardcore Tubeheadz out there that will let no man, woman or child stand in the way of their ultimate listening pleasure. To them; I salute you! We should all have the good manners to stand back and admire their pure and uncompromising dedication to an utterly extravagant and overwhelmingly hardcore indulgence in a world that is growing more mundane and impersonal each and every spirit sapping day. Come home to these perfect REF600 Mk.III monoblocks every night and you will be lifted to another dimension of reality that so few will ever experience in their lifetime it almost makes you feel an ounce of pity for their sad and sorry souls. But nay, I did said; almost.

Wow, that is awesome!!

[janmike]

Awesome, but I would love to have them.

[Ricardo]

"B&W 801 series 3. Enough said. I don't have the boxes so local pickup only. I do have manuals Will throw in cables. Have sound anchor stands. Moving in with girlfriend who just doesn't get it."

Jeeeeezzzz........don't move...

[zombie boy 2000]

This is a chance to purchase an awesome surround system with the legendary Bose powered acoustimass module for a fraction of full retail pricing, you will be awestruck when you hear your favorite DVD leaping out at you with unbelievable realism!

Do I really want my favorite DVD jumping out at me with "unbelievable realism"? It might put an eye out. And "unbelievable realism" just smacks of oxymoron.

[BaggedLancer]

We have 11 tapes from the late 1980's and early 1990's. These tapes are fantastic. They just don't make XXX like this anymore. Titles include Raunch-o-rama, Kink-o-Rama, Climactic Scenes, and Colossal Combos. Most tapes are 2 to 4 hours worth of 5-minute climax scenes. Many include the legendary Ron Jeremy. The tapes are particularly good if you enjoy the more natural look of women from 15 to 20 years ago.

I don't care who ya are, that's funny right thurrr.

[BaggedLancer]

http://boston.craigslist.org/sob/clt/442424522.html

"Have a look -- and call before wife gets back from church!!! $125 or best offer for person with a fast car! "

[Polk65]

[BaggedLancer]

lol that can't be a serious for sale ad, that thing is junk!

[ABX]

The Audio Research Reference 600 monoblocks are a fling, a one-night stand or a filthily expensive, unforgettable dirty weekend. These babies don't want anything to do with, or even any trace of, a long-term relationship. They could tear your heart apart and leave you broke in the blink of an eye and you would just have to pick yourself up again get on with your life.

If you are still lucky enough to be single and insist on having THE biggest pair of stainless steel testicles in Australia then these mammoth monsters have your name on the shipping label. Providing of course you can pay for them but at less than half the cost of their original new price are you going to complain? Well some of you will I am sure but you know what you can do about that...

Let nobody doubt your manhood ever again with these World Heavy Weight Champions featured prominently in your Hi-Fi room on centre stage.

Much to my disappointment, never have I sold any Reference 600's to a customer that has had a gal to answer to. Too spineless and pussy whipped I'm afraid is all too often the case. But there are a few Hardcore Tubeheadz out there that will let no man, woman or child stand in the way of their ultimate listening pleasure. To them; I salute you! We should all have the good manners to stand back and admire their pure and uncompromising dedication to an utterly extravagant and overwhelmingly hardcore indulgence in a world that is growing more mundane and impersonal each and every spirit sapping day. Come home to these perfect REF600 Mk.III monoblocks every night and you will be lifted to another dimension of reality that so few will ever experience in their lifetime it almost makes you feel an ounce of pity for their sad and sorry souls. But nay, I did said; almost.

Classic

[SCompRacer]

From an amp ad on ebay.

[Ricardo]

He killed the cat????????? That's....funny...

[daboyz]

From an amp ad on ebay.

That was hilarious:D

[millerman 3732]

All these cat lovers around here aren't going to like that. I'm not one of them though. :D

[BaggedLancer]

Hmm the seller is Scompracer....wonder who that could be :)

[george daniel]

That is too funny,I'm still laughing :)

[Kex]

How could there be enough current in a speaker cable to kill a cat? Who is he hoping will buy his amp? Rampaging cat murderers? In any case, I think that e-Bay seller might need some help from Dr. Phil ...

[SCompRacer]

Hmm the seller is Scompracer....wonder who that could be :)

:D

I had no buyers from CP so it ended up on ebay, where a fellow from WI purchased it. I had some fun with the ad but edited it before it was posted. No cats were killed by that RB-1090 while I owned it.

EDIT: I also changed the word Amplifryer in the title to Amplifier.

[BaggedLancer]

I purchased the new Transformers DVD, on HD DVD, thinking my PS3 supported all DVD formats. Come to find out, it doesn't. I need to sell this and get the regular DVD version. I paid over $30 with taxes, so I'm only asking $30 for the box. It's the special edition two disc HD DVD version. I only opened the package to insert the movie for the first time, so it's in IMMACULATE condition. Let me know if you want it. Thanks.

Apparently to him HD DVD and Blu Ray are the same thing :D

[Ricardo]

"You are looking at a personally designed matched 5:1 "Surround Sound Speaker System" by Mathew Polk back when he owned "Polk" and their product was considered top shelf. He sold his company about 7-years ago and the speakers are now made in Tijuana, Mexico and are very poor quality.

http://cls.audiogon.com/cgi-bin/cls....ull&1200722567

[BaggedLancer]

"You are looking at a personally designed matched 5:1 "Surround Sound Speaker System" by Mathew Polk back when he owned "Polk" and their product was considered top shelf. He sold his company about 7-years ago and the speakers are now made in Tijuana, Mexico and are very poor quality.

http://cls.audiogon.com/cgi-bin/cls....ull&1200722567

LOL! You going to enlighten him?

[Ricardo]

Sent a PM to Mark (Doro) asking if Polk would contact the guy or something.