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  1. #1

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    Default Happy Birthday, Chuck....er....I mean, Mr. Norris!


  2. #2

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    May he live long & continue to prosper.
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  3. #3

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    Wow. 70? Never would've thought he's that old.
    Happy Birthday!!!
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  4. #4

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    Jason Borne could take Chucky-poo and Jack Bauer at the same time!!!

    Wes
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  5. #5

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    ..."Chuck Norris is so fast, he can start a fire by rubbing two ice cubes together"...

    :D
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  6. #6

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    Don't mess with Chuck or you'll get the BIG BANZAI!

    Happy Birthday!

  7. #7

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    Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.

    H9: If you don't trust what you are hearing, then maybe you need to be less invested in a hobby which all the pleasure comes from listening to music.

  8. #8

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    Happy 71st, Mr. Norris!!

    Though the site contains most known (and unknown facts) about Norris, we thought we'd add a few of our own in honor of his birthday:

    1. Chuck Norris doesn't blow out birthday candles. He looks at them and they melt.

    2. When Chuck Norris was born, he delivered himself before delivering a roundhouse kick to the doctor.

    3. Chuck Norris can vomit and eat cupcakes at the same time.

    4. When Chuck Norris was a kid, he didn't need clowns at his birthday parties because he had his fists for entertainment.

    5. Clowns don't perform at Chuck Norris' birthday. Chuck Norris performs at clowns' birthdays.

    6. Chuck Norris doesn't age, he just gets more and more lethal.

    7. When Jon Hamm heard he was born on Chuck Norris' birthday, he cried tears of joy.

    8. Don't give Chuck Norris a birthday spanking. His butt will shatter your hand.

    9. Chuck Norris' favorite ice cream flavor? Bloody Revenge (Now with 50 percent more real blood!).

    10. Chuck Norris' birthday suit can totally kick your [expletive].

  9. #9

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    I heard that before the boogy man goes to bed he checks his closet for Chuck Norris
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  10. #10

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    Chuck Norris isn’t lactose intolerant. He just doesn’t put up with lactose’s $h!t.

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